How’s it going?!? Before I get too far into my writings today I really want to thank everyone who reads this blog and all the encouraging messages I get on Facebook and on messenger weekly. I have said since day one of starting this blog even if my words help only one person than writing it out on paper was worth it and I still believe this wholeheartedly. The reason I write is to inspire and to let it be known that no one and I mean no one should struggle with their demons alone. This life we live is hard and knowing there are people who can tell those hard truths and overcome such hardships gives me hope not only for my life but humanity in general. So I thank you all for the support and continued encouragement.
Oh man anyone else have a crazy weekend? I know my family sure did. But it was a great feeling being busy, because for the first time in a long time we were busy as a family where everyone was included. My entire family participated in serving our community and not just for one day but several days. My family was on fire this weekend with communicating and really working as a team so we could successful do “all the things” that were on our schedule. I heard something last week in the RISE Together podcast that said “kids do not listen to what you say, they listen to what you do” and this comment really resonated with me. Especially because on Saturday when my husband and I were talking openly about what is the thing we fight about the most? The answer was “parenting our son”. Now the people who know us personally may think really?! But you guys are great parents and to them I would say thank you! But there is also a hard truth both my husband and I have realized is we do not at all parent our son the same way. My husband is sure I baby our 5 year old too much, while I am also sure my husband can be too hard and insensitive to our child’s feelings. One thing I’ve learned early on in this parenting journey, is it is completely ok to not parent the same and dad’s way versus mom’s way of parenting is not right or wrong. My husband may not give my son a bath the way I like it done, my husband may not console my child’s tears the way I like it done but it also does not make how he does things wrong. In this way of thinking though I fully am aware of just how much our child is watching us as parents handle arguments, handle stress, handle fitness, handle life’s daily tasks and he is learning by mom and dad’s actions and our responses to handling this thing called life. So my response to my husband is we may not parent, console and do things the same and that’s all ok, but we also need to be more vigilant in the fact that little eyes are and have been paying more attention to our actions. That even goes for our actions with how we discipline.
This brings me to the Ripple effect our son Urijah will learn to speak how we speak, just by the way we talk to each other everyday. He will learn to speak the bad words exactly the ways we use the bad words. Yes, he might not be driving now because he is only 5 but he is actively watching mom and dad wear our seat belts when we are in the car, texting while driving or just being on the phone in general while driving. Our actions now as parents will ultimately shape the driver he will become later. Trust me, I am aware of all these actions and I say them not because I have mastered doing all these things correctly, rather I am saying these things out loud to fellow parents, or even new parents struggling with the “parenting” topic you my friends are not alone. Admitting my husband and I have some work in areas of our parenting is not going to cause us to break up, rather it can encourage us to work even harder to fix our flawed behaviors. The ripple effect not only happens with the things my son sees inside our home life but also by the things we do outside of the home, things like small group, workouts, serving our community are just to name a few. Which is why this weekend meant so much to me.
My faith journey as an adult and a mom started for me a little over 4 years ago. But it started just like I said for me. Being my son was little I would bring him and my toddler niece to church services as well. In these last few months god has been hard at work changing our family dynamic and really bringing us back to ground zero, on what’s important. I say “god” because for the last 4 years I have prayed for my husband to open up his heart, at least the idea of church and not just on a holiday. I realized early on I am not powerful enough to change a grown man’s heart, nor am I the pushy, nagging wife to want my husband to want exactly the things I want. But this weekend would show me in god’s time and with much patience he was listening and working not only in me but also in my husband. We served at my sons Elementary school together Friday night, I worked the craft table and my husband served food to the community. Then on Sunday we would serve together again working at our community Trunk or Treat event, held by a church the both of us would attend together and complete an entire 4 week church series. This was a huge deal! And I will give god the glory on this one! Again another Ripple effect in the making when it comes to our son. As his parents we only want the best life for our son. We want him to work hard for his dreams, we would love him to be a man of faith, to be a leader in his community. We can tell him we want all these things for him and have it go in one ear and out the other or we can show him how all these things are possible and educate him on how he can make all this happen for himself when he gets older.
Do you see just how powerful a Ripple Effect can be? I sure can and this gives me hope to really work on myself, work on my attitude, work on my faith and my communication with my husband. As always guys if my writings inspired you please share my blog link with your friends. Please also find me on social media, send me a message on Facebook! You can enter your e-mail address under the “follow me” section that way you get notified when new content is posted. We will be using the e-mail followers too once my book launch date gets closer to give away free Swag and possibly some free books! #Thisismedoinglife #Rippleeffect #Godsgotthis